I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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