dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
