before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
