why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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