What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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