Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
