I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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