man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
