I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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