dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
