Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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