I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
