He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
This baby is an asshole
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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