i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
How does it feel to date your dad?
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