Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
