Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
