Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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