their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I need moral support for this bender
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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