She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
