S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
And the cops told us we were all naked.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
