I am puke
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
