Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester

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(410): View more from Maryland

She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family

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(705): View more from Ontario

Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(713): View more from Texas

screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

All my credit cards need to be pressure washed

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(305): View more from Florida

Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is

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(410): View more from Maryland

I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company

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(720): View more from Colorado

He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship

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