Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key

(631): View more from New York

had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.

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(631): Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key (631): had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now. http://tfl.nu/o06a

Replies (21) Good night (1006) Bad night (937)
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(913): View more from Kansas

No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.

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(913): No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands. http://tfl.nu/4dof

Replies (7) Good night (1112) Bad night (4019)
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(360): View more from Washington

You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.

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(360): You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there. http://tfl.nu/r1ke

Replies (18) Good night (5427) Bad night (721)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later

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(715): We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later http://tfl.nu/4xtv

Replies (11) Good night (5055) Bad night (1148)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns

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(978): I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns http://tfl.nu/xc39

Replies (10) Good night (5161) Bad night (1875)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis

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(215): This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis http://tfl.nu/mvim

Replies (17) Good night (1685) Bad night (2839)
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(815): View more from Illinois

walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.

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(815): walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill. http://tfl.nu/3jcw

Replies (5) Good night (2424) Bad night (1085)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie

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(612): Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie http://tfl.nu/901f

Replies (4) Good night (2534) Bad night (821)
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(313): View more from Michigan

I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.

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(313): I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer. http://tfl.nu/dqld

Replies (19) Good night (1492) Bad night (765)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.

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(405): I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation. http://tfl.nu/hpn0

Replies (2) Good night (1309) Bad night (490)
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(703): View more from Virginia

He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box

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(703): He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box http://tfl.nu/9koo

Replies (8) Good night (1015) Bad night (579)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.

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(501): I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job. http://tfl.nu/8e8h

Replies (10) Good night (1990) Bad night (602)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?

(315): View more from New York

Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.

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(202): Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse? (315): Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance. http://tfl.nu/q51f

Replies (2) Good night (918) Bad night (355)
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(905): View more from Ontario

So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?

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(905): So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night? http://tfl.nu/yq72

Replies (3) Good night (1049) Bad night (268)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.

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(719): Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better. http://tfl.nu/osci

Replies (2) Good night (282) Bad night (844)

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