I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.