He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
