Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
