Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
