It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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