In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
