DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
