there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I have fence marks all over my body
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.