I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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