Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
where are you?
Hypothermia
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
