she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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