Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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