If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize