so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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