This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Alive.
So much puke
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
