I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
