Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
