fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
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THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.