i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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