First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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