you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
