i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
You left your phone here
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