I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
