Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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