I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
