jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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