Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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