How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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